MOD Q & A / Q & A

Q & A no contact with biological father

Q & A

Q. If a child has no contact or limited contact with their biological father, will they get any sins for not talking to him.

A.

The Prophet (SAW) said that cutting relations with relatives is in general a serious sin:

1. Hadith:

حدثنا عبد الله بن صالح قال: حدثني الليث قال: حدثني عقيل عن بن شهاب أخبرني محمد بن جبير بن مطعم أن جبير بن مطعم أخبره أنه سمع رسول الله يقول: لا يدخل الجنة قاطع رحم.

English:

`Abd Allah b. Salih related to us and said: Layth related to me and said: `Uqayl related to me from Ibn Shihab that: Muhammad b. Jubayr b. Mu`tim informed me that Jubayr b. Mut`im heard the Messenger of Allah [SAW] say: The one who severs ties of kinship will not enter the Garden.[1]

2. Hadith:  

حدثنا حجاج بن منهال قال: حدثنا شعبة قال: أخبرني محمد بن عبد الجبار قال: سمعت محمد بن كعب أنه سمع أبا هريرة يحدث عن رسول الله قال: إن الرحم شجنة من الرحمن تقول: يا رب إني ظلمت! يا رب إني قطعت! يا رب! إني! إني! فيجيبها: ألا ترضين أن أقطع من قطعك وأصل من وصلك.

 

 

English: 

Hajjaj b. Manhal said that: Shu`bah related to us that: Muhammad b. `Abd al-Jabbar informed me and said: I heard Muhammad b. Ka`b that he heard Abu Hurayrah [RA] speaking about the Messenger of Allah [SAW] that he said: Ties of kinship is derived from the All-Merciful. They say: My Lord! I have been wronged! My Lord! I have been cut off! My Lord! I have! I have! Allah then answers them: Are you not content that I cut off the one who cuts you off and I maintain ties with the one who maintains ties with you?[2]

If severing the relationship with relatives is serious, what then of one’s own parents? If one is not speaking to one’s father whether out of anger, hatred, awkwardness, difficulty or some other reason(s), it must be resolved in the best possible manner so that speaking terms can be re-established. It is narrated by Imam Ahmad in his Musnad that the Prophet (SAW) said:

Hadith 3:

عن سهل عن أبــــيه عن النبي (صلى الله عليه و سلم) قال: أن لله عبادا لا يكلمهم الله يمة القيامة و لا يزكيهم و لهم عذاب أليم . قيل: من يا رسول الله؟ قال: متبر من والديه و راغب عنهما…

English:

From Sahl from his father from the Prophet (SAW) who said: Indeed, Allah will have slaves on the Day of Judgment and will neither speak to them nor purify them and they will have a sever punishment. [The companions] asked: Who are they, Messenger of Allah? He replied: those who disown their parents and abandon them[3]

In reality, no father ever desires to lose his child and no child desires to lose his/her father. There should be no severing of contact with one’s father rather forgiveness, love and blessings must be sought and through the contact perhaps a new lease of relationship and reward is established.

 

And with Allah alone is success.


[1] See al-Bukhari, Adab al-Mufrad, hadith no.64, pp.37-38 as well as in his Sahih, hadith no.5984; al-Bayhaqi in Shu`ab al-Iman, hadith no.7952; the Musannaf of Ibn Abi Shaybah, hadith no.20382; Ahmad in his Musnad, 4/84 and al-Humaydi in his Musnad, hadith no.537; Abu Dawud, hadith no.1696; al-Tirmidhi, hadith no.1909 and al-Bayhaqi, vol.7, p.27 all in their Sunans; Ibn Hibban in his Sahih, hadith no.454; al-Baghawi, Sharh al-Sunnah, hadith no.3437 and Ibn Qani` in Mu`jam al-Ashab, vol.1, p.147.

[2] See Bukhari in the Adab al-Mufrad, hadith no.65, p.38 as well as his Sahih, hadith no.5988 Ahmad in the Musnad, 2/295; al-Tayalisi in his Musnad, hadith no.2543; the Musannaf of Ibn Abi Shaybah, hadith no.25394; Ibn Hibban, Sahih, hadith no.442; al-Hakim in the Mustadrak, vol.4, p.162 and al-Baghawi, Sharh al-Sunnah, hadith no.3434.

[3] See Ahmad, al-Musnad, hadith no.15083.

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