MOD Q & A / Q & A

Q & A Emphasis on father not just mother

Q & A

Q . There is a great emphasis on respecting your mother. What about your father? Do you have to treat them equally?

A.

It is without doubt, that a child must obey and respect both his/her Mother and Father. Allah (SWT) says in the Qur’an:

(And we have ordered human beings to be kind and obedient towards [their] parents).

The obedience ordained in the verse (ayah) holds equally for both parents but immediately after the mother’s especial mention is given because of her difficulties in carrying the child while pregnant, suckling the child after birth as well as her general effort and toil in rearing, bringing up and nurturing the children and family.[1] This does not mean, however, that the father has no stature or importance.

In two wonderful Prophetic narrations (ahadith), the Holy Prophet (SAW) stated that:

1. “Obedience to Allah is in the obedience to the father”.[2]

2. “The pleasure of Allah is in the pleasure of the father and the anger of Allah is in the anger of the Father.”[3]

Therefore obedience to and respect towards the father is a religiously prescribed duty The honour and status given to them is established through their link to Allah directly in terms of pleasure and displeasure. Thus, we must attempt to avoid disappointing our fathers or arousing their anger and hurt as this will arouse the displeasure and anger of Allah.
 
 
And Allah knows best.
 
s.z.c.
 

[1] See Imam Ahmad Reza Khan, al-Huquq li-Tarh al-`Uquq, pp.7-8.

[2] Arabic: طاعة الله طاعة الوالد و معصية الله معصية الوالد. Narrated by al-Tabarani from Abu Hurayra (RA) in the Mu`jam al-Awsat, 3:132 (hadith no.  6822).

[3] Arabic: رضا الله في رضا الوالد و سخط الله في سخط الوالد. Narrated by al-Tirmidhi in his Sunan (hadith no. 1899); Bukhari in the Adab al-Mufrad (hadith no. 2), p.6; Ibn Hibban in his Sahih (hadith no. 429); al-Bayhaqi, Shu`ab al-Iman (hadith no. 7830); al-Baghawi, Sharh al-Sunnah (hadith no. 3424); Ibn Wahb in al-Jami` (hadith no. 92).

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